Rihanna - You are an amazing, insightful, and smart young woman. Your singular act of bravery by appearing on 20/20 last week is truly one of the important, pivotal moments in our struggle to change the way the world views domestic violence. Bravo.Chris Brown - You've got a long way to go. If you think this is any way a private matter, you are stuck back in 1965. Rihanna acknowledges and you must too, that EVERYONE is watching and learning by your actions, your choices, and your words.
In Chris Brown's scripted apology, he can't hide his true thoughts and feelings. He tries to say all the right things, but his frustration and annoyance with Rihanna comes out when he talks about his apology, "I am telling you and I have TOLD Rihanna countless times..." When I hear it, it sounds like, "I have told that B**** countless times." See what you think:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CzZUsNC76GU
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When left to his own, he did what most batterers do - he said he couldn't remember, couldn't talk, and now says it is should be "a private matter." He says, "That's not who I am." Actually, yes - that is who you are. The first step in being different is accepting that you made the decision to use violence. And it is that - a decision - a choice.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GLmn30nORzA&feature=PlayList&p=5E7D8626F58F3A16&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=23
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What strikes me now is how they both grew up in homes with domestic violence. Both have publically talked about it. Rihanna has made the connection. I hope Chris Brown eventually does. He'll be happier and so will his next partner. Rihanna is well on her way to understanding, accepting, and becoming healthy.
2 comments:
It must have taken Rihanna a lot of courage to speak-out. I think it is so important to speak-out about domestic violence. As we do, those who are abusive begin to lose their power as their behavior is not a mystery anymore. I worked in the domestic violence field for 7 years as a counselor, community educator, and policy/legislative analyst.
Anyway, I also founded a free site for social workers My Social Work Network (www.mysocialworknetwork.com). It's a free online community where social workers can network, search social work jobs, blog, keep up to date on news, post and browse resources, etc. I've posted things on domestic violence on there, particularly Lundy Bancroft's work. I invite all to visit and to spread the word if you believe the site adds value to our profession. If you currently have a blog, joining the site can help you gain readership. I hope it can serve as an important resource in the work we do.
Thanks for stopping by "My Social Network." I'll check out your website and glad to have the support. - CJSW
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